Well that makes sense....

So in my last post I lamented the fact that despite a month of consistent exercise and calorie-reduction I've only lost one pound.  I also posted about how I have been dealing with severe insomnia and other sleep problems.  Well, apparently the lack of sleep can impact my weight loss.  Click here for the article.  I guess I may have to see my doctor about this for real!

sick time necessities

it is sick time season and as i have been sick in bed since last tuesday (miserable stupid non-flu but same symptoms as flu virus) i thought i would give you a list of necessities for surviving the nasty sick times.

i went through and numbered the things in these pictures but as i am drugged up and it is past midnight i did not do it legibly.  You may be able to read it.  may not.  oh well.  also--this is not a sympathy request, i just thought my sick nest was funny looking and wanted to share it, and i may be making bad choices due to the copious amounts of drugs in my system.  as such, please ignore errors in spelling, punctuation, grammar, and the like.  I'm a bit loopy.

First and most importantly:  kick your spouse out--into the guest room.  no shared germies please.  This can be lonely, but hopefully will save him from misery.  I have barely seen my husband in a week :(.

Alright, this next picture is your necessities for surviving (really just things that are on my right side)



you will need:
1. a trashcan close to the bed.  mine is 100% full of tissues (and one cough medicine bottle...make that 99% full of tissues)
2.  a humidifier.  helps w/the sore throat & dryness and the whirring makes it easy to sleep
3.  magazines.  they make for entertainment
4.  laptop--keeps you somewhat connected to the real world.
5.  nice comfy shoes for those rare occasions when you leave the bed
6. mouse for the laptop--encourages laziness
7.  giant  water bottle--gotta keep hydrated!
8. neosporin.  maybe not a thought for everyone, but it helps heal the cracked nose from all the blowing (see #1)
9.  i like ayr saline gel--put it in your nose and it helps you breathe
10.  contact case...just because sometimes i like to see
11. cell phone: another means of communicating with the outside world
12.  glasses...mine only have one ear piece.  this is why i still prefer contacts even when i'm sick.  maybe i should get new ones.
13.  dosage cup for cough medicine.  IMPERATIVE!!
14.  music.  needed to keep spirits up (and a clock so you don't completely forget what time/day it is)
15.  pillows.  lots of pillows.
16.  nighttime cough medicine.  daytime cough medicine would probably be a good idea too as taking nighttime cough medicine during the day contributes to the confusion of day/night.  (and don't even get me started on how miserable i am that i had to get sick during a recall of my beloved blue medicine!!!!)
17.  bowl w/extras: chapstick, fingernail clippers, ponytail holders, matches...wait, why are there matches??  not really sure.  other stuff is good  though.
18.  box of extras: lotion for hands & face, ibuprophen, vitamins, sleeping pills, ink pens, whatever you need
19.  pop tart wrapper on the floor...huh.  guess i was too delirious to throw it 12 inches to the left into the garbage can.  ok.  we fixed that.
20.  scentsy warmer & scent bar.  well, this was a nice thought until i realized that i couldn't smell.  so you may not need that until you're better.

Now to image #2 (which contains the most important supply of all)

and please ignore the bat leaning against hubs' dresser (of course you will now that i've pointed it out) that is his weapon in case someone breaks in...the vaccuum on the other side of the dresser is my weapon for terrorizing the cat.

okay, back to the list;

1.  purple cooshie pillow.  important for hugging since hubs is quarantined in the other room.  nice & comfy...but it can't be washed so i'm not quite sure how we will sanitize this once i'm better...
2. fleece bulldog print pants belonging to husband.  good for staying warm during the chills.  bad during the feverish sweating times. (which is why they are crumpled on the side of the bed)
3.  Harry Potter books.  VERY important sick time reading.  I had started the series again before Christmas & read the last two over the first few days of sickness.  Then felt lost & depressed that the series was over and started again.  definitely my favorite sick time books--i read them for the first time when I got mono in 2007 so they are my go-to comfort books
4.  tissues.  also VERY important.  I have gone through nearly 2 boxes.  I would recommend getting one box of the lotiony kind though.  I didn't have any b/c I hate how greasy they feel when I'm not sick, but when I am sick the regular ones feel like sandpaper
5. Twilight books.  Haven't started re-reading these yet but have them for an option...another fun guilty pleasure read when my brain is tired & sore.
6. Jen Lancaster books.  LOVE HER.  hilarious...maybe too much so to read now when laughing throws me into a coughing fit.
7.  extra socks.  because your feet might get cold.
8. various & sundry blankets for piling on during chills and then throwing off wildly during sweats.
9.  MOST IMPORTANT OF ALL!!  a cuddly lazy bulldog to remind you that you are still loved when the rest of the world can't come near you!

reminded

Ever since I quit my office job last July and have worked so hard to make lifestyle changes to better my health, I get this idea that I am "better" (i wonder what it means that the first time i typed that i typed "butter" instead of "better"...lol)  Yeah, I still have little flare-ups: lymph nodes swell, low-grade fever, body aches, etc.. but it's nothing like before.  So i think & wish in my heart that I'm coming through this and that all those dreams for my future will come true. 

And then there's a day like yesterday.  On Friday night at 8:30 I got a call f/m my Scentsy director that she was not going to be able to make a women's show the next morning but I could go.  So I said ok--it is a great opportunity to build business and all that.  But I was scrambling that night trying to find what I would need and running to set up my table--went to bed at one and couldn't sleep until after 2...didn't sleep well at all... And then a day of being "on" all day and giving sales pitches from 9:30-3 the next day just wore me out.  I came home w/a sore throat & headache and a full-blown symptom flare up and spent the rest of the day in bed. 

Today I am hurting and ever so fatigued. I have so much to do, my house is a mess, next week is the last week before classes start back for the students.  I'm not prepared. And I feel discouraged. I've wasted time over my break and haven't accomplished what I wanted to.  But more than that, days like this scare me.  Will I ever really be able to have kids if I get worn out so easily?  I'm not so sure.  I'm not good at staying on top of what needs to be done anymore.  My heart hurts. 

Goals: 2010 vs. 2011

Last year I had some really good goals and worked hard at holding myself accountable by posting about them on the blog regularly.  Some things I actually did well on, some not so much.  So to start this year I figured that it would be good to evaluate how I did last year and set some new (or more defined) goals for 2011.

So first--the goals of 2010:

1.  Improve my Overall Health.  Mostly a fail, with some postitive changes made.  I really did start last year w/good intentions but constant illness really hampered my progress.  I think the best and most consistent change that I made was started my water aerobics class which gives a guaranteed 2 days/week to exercise.  I'm still fatter than I was at this time last year though :/

2. Be a better steward of our money.  I can confidently say that I greatly improved in this area!  (well, I kinda had to with the whole dropping to only one primary income...).  I severely cut back on shopping and have made a conscious effort to consider things before buying them, and also to return things if I get home and realize that it was a bad purchase.  And I let most of my magazine subscriptions lapse! woohoo!!

3.  Let things go.  Much improved in this area as well. We had a yard sale in October and got rid of lots of junk--and the things that didn't sell went to consignment or donations: not back into the house.  I've also purged a lot of the magazines that I had saved.

4.  Waste less time.  I still have a problem w/computer games!!  I unsubscribed to a lot of blogs though and have honestly been more busy during my evenings to the time wasting isn't as bad.  Still could use progress though.

5.  Read books.  Another success!  (though I have fallen back into the Harry Potter series again rather than reading new books...).  I should have kept a list but I know I read at least 10.  Much better than previous years!

6.  Organize/cleaning.  Eh...i've done better about having a cleaning routine for our common areas, and have purged a lot of junk, but I am just never going to be a neatnick.  Some progress, but much more room for improvement.

7.  Spend more time w/hubs.  Hmm...it comes and goes in spurts.  I don't know how well we did about quantity of time together, but I think we did a little better at quality time together when we could have it.  Still needs work though.

8.  Spend time with God daily.  Much improved over the previous year--I actually read through the whole Bible this year!  And with my job now being ministry, making it a priority has been much more important.  I did not do it every day, but am doing much better!

Alright, so to my goals for this year.  Much of the same, but this year I want to add a new focus to several of them:  must accomplish/work on goal before we can start a family.  We are not ready for kids yet, but are getting emotionally closer to that point and several things really need to happen before my body can handle pregnancy (if God blesses us in that way) and before our housse will have room for a child!


So here are the goals for 2011:
1.  Lose at least 30 pounds.  I've just got to do this.  I would like to lose more but want to be realistic (and that is still a big number to me).  I am no longer working at my old job so I have time to devote to eating well & excercising.  There is no room for excuses!  And I need to take care of my body in order to be physically able to handle potentially carrying a child and also caring for one.  It's not just about how I feel, it's about our future.  

2.  Eat a salad for at least 4 meals each week & exercise at least 5 times a week.  (and mayonnaise based chicken & tuna salads don't count...nor do jello salads ;) ) I feel like these are realistic steps that I can take to mindfully work towards my goals.

3. Focus on quality time w/hubs & a focused dinner at least once a week.  We are bad about eating in front of the TV and when I did our candlelight dinner on Christmas I realized how much just moving into the other room changes things.  Even if his work keeps him too busy to go out on a date each week, we can have an in-house date at the dining room table.  And I need to focus on him when he makes the time to be w/me rather than trying to multi-task.

4.  Give myself freedom to throw things away.  I've talked about my hoarding tendencies, and part of that is that I really struggle w/throwing things in the trash that are not food products or packaging.  I recycle ALL accepted plastics & paper products and even recycle any plastic grocery bags from when i forget my reusable bags.  What this means is that I have kept broken things b/c I couldn't find a way to recycle them...and that I have a HUGE bags of socks, undershirts, and underwear with holes in them b/c I feel guilty to throw away cloth products.  I've even contacted pet shelters to try to see if they would take them for pet beds! (they said no)  It's a little bit absurd.  So this year, I'm allowing myself to throw away the broken fan, the bag of holey undergarments, and Butch's toys that she has pulled the stuffing out of!.  No reason to clutter up my life with garbage right??

5. Declutter & organize.  Despite progress that we've made, we still have too much stuff and I need to continue to work on the house.  At this point, though we have a decent sized house w/3 bedrooms, there is room for no more stuff!  If we ever want to have a child we need a place to put it lol!  and I've heard that babies come w/a lot of stuff too ;)

6.  Start a cleaning schedule for non "common areas".  I'm pretty good about cleaning our living room, dining room, kitchen, and guest bath each week since I have the Bible study girls coming to motivate me.  Our bedroom & bathroom and the craft room however, are a nightmare.  I need to get a schedule for doing that, even if it's rotating areas every other week or something.

7.  Time w/God daily.  A continuation from last year.  Something that I have an inward battle over is idolizing what that time has to look like though.  I tell my Bible study girls all the time that a marriage or isn't defined by having romantic dates every day, but instead living our lives together day in and day out--some days it is a quick kiss in the morning and a few minutes to chat before bed, others are really focused on each other.  In the same way, our walks with the Lord shouldn't be a formula of a one-hour quiet time with reading/journaling/prayer and then we're done, but instead learning to intertwine our faith into every part of the our lives.  In that analogy we give ourselves the freedom to some days have more intense study while in other times it is mulling over a verse as we go about our day, but all the while keeping connected to the Lord through prayer. This balance is something I need to work on, and I also feel it is the only way to prevent ourselves from having an all or nothing attitude about it (aka, I don't have time to spend an hour with the Lord, therefore I'm gonna skip it altogether).  My goal for the majority of the year will be to read a chapter of the Bible or work on my Isaiah BSF study, and also to read from the Oswald Chambers devotional from my dad.  Then journaling as I see fit. 

8.  Do the 90 day Bible challenge again.  Maybe that sounds like it's in opposition to the last point, but I realized that doing that (though I did spread the last bit over a few months) was a great exercise in discipline for me and also really helped me to know where things are in the Bible and to increase my understanding.  My goal is to do this over the summer months when things are slow, but also not to beat myself up about it if I don't complete it in 90 days.  Reading the bible is a reward in itself!

9.  Learn to coupon!  Money is tighter than before and I have a ton of friends who save really big w/couponing.  I won't go all out crazy like some of the people, but I really want to do this to help cut the costs of feeding all the students and to even out the baking expenses...

10.  Catch up on my scrapbooks.  I am working on the book for the summer before college...8 years ago.  I really want to get my pictures done before having kids b/c I'm sure that then I will only want to do albums of them!  And if I can at least catch up on the printed photos, I can do digital albums for the rest.

and...to round it out to match the year:

11.  Cook from my cookbooks.  I have a RIDICULOUS amount of cookbooks (which I need to be thinning) so when I am looking for a recipe I need to look to the cookbooks before the internet.  And maybe thin my collection a bit as well. 

Alright, I think that is a good list for 2011.  And, as last year, I plan to post check-ins on here to hold myself accountable, or else I will ignore it all!  How about you?  Any big resolutions/goals?

What it feels like to be sick...

I got an email today from a fellow food blogger who also deals with a chronic illness and she mentioned something that I haven't heard of before--the "spoon theory"--as a way to explain how it feels to people in your life.  I googled it and ran across this video which brought me to tears.

Watch it first, then we'll talk about it ;)





Okay--I'm not looking for sympathy here.  I don't have Lupus or cancer or anything life-threatening and I've adapted to having CFS & Fibro over the past 3 years so I function pretty well.  I can get ready in the morning easily at this point, (though I won't lie, when I first got sick I had to rest after taking a shower...)  My problems won't kill me.  I can keep going, just at a slower pace.

But I have to think about my "spoons" regularly.  Even mental focus while I'm sitting takes something out of me and after a meeting I'm tired with a sore throat and swollen lymph nodes.  For the past two weekends I have done too much around the house so that by Sunday I am too sore & exhausted to do anything.  I have to plan my days carefully and take time to rest between things--or know that if I don't I will need a day of doing nothing to deal with the repercussions.  I feel guilty that I sleep in till 9 now that I quit my job and am doing part time work with CRU, but if I don't get that sleep the day starts off with pain.  And regularly sleeping a few hours later and being balanced is a lot better than before when I was getting up early and overdoing it through the week and then hibernating all weekend!  Things are SO much better now that I have more time to rest and am doing what I am passionate about, but I still have bad days and even weeks.  On good days I question myself--"Is this all in my head?"  "Am I just not pushing myself enough?" "Am I just lazy?"  On bad days I thank God for a tangible sign that I'm not just crazy--swollen lymph nodes & a fever.  This is just life now.  It is still a good life and I've learned a lot--specifically about resting in the Lord and trusting Him to provide--but its a different life than I had imagined for myself.

Thanks for caring enough to read this!

Book review: Such a Pretty Fat by Jen Lancaster

Almost a year ago I used some of my Zoompanel points to get a memoir that immediately caught my eye based on the title and cover art (yes, I judged a book by it's cover...so sue me).  This lovely and hilarious book is Such a Pretty Fat by my new favorite author--Jen Lancaster.  And of course, it's another memoir, b/c that is what I'm all about these days, and I figured that it would be a perfect airplane/beach read on my vacation.

I love the "alternate" title: "Why Pie Is Not the Answer"--Hilarious!  Should be my motto!

One thing that I hate is reading books with characters who are obsessed with their weight and always complaining about being fat when they aren't even in the "normal" BMI range.  I just want to punch skinny girls who fuss about needing to lose weight--especially around those of us who are honestly struggling to get healthy and feel good about ourselves.  But it's also no fun to read sob stories about how depressed overweight girls are--yes, it's a hard struggle, and definitely something that I relate to, but sometimes people are just so down on themselves that it brings you down to hear about it.  

Well, this is not the case at all with Such a Pretty Fat.  Mrs. Lancaster is admittedly overweight, but actually has very high self esteem which I find extremely refreshing.  The title is a play on the two-faced compliment "you have such a pretty face" which of course is never said about overall pretty or friendly people...there is always a but, even if it's unspoken (which is hilariously discussed on pp. 145-147).  This memoir details her realization that her weight was becoming a problem for her health, the decision to write about it, and her experiences with some of the popular weight-loss corporations.

I absolutely adored this book! I read all but about the last 50 pages on the planes & in the airport--a super fast and enjoyable read (even at almost 400 pages).  I had to put it down a few times b/c I was laughing so hard the I was afraid I would disturb the person next to me on the plane! (see p. 54-55 "Two Fat People Admit Defeat": an actual ad that she placed in the wanted ads in order to sell their exercise bike).  I love her writing style, I love her honesty, I love her health success, I lover her pop-culture references, and I love that she wears pink crocs ;).  Seriously, I have now ordered all her other books, and am subscribing to her blog & twitter.  I know, I'm a dork; but she's hilarious!  I definitely recommend this to anyone who has ever struggled with weight loss and self esteem--it is nice to read about it in a light-hearted manner.  (disclaimer, she uses *colorful* language, if that kind of thing offends you).

And if you like the Twilight series you absolutely must read her hilarious blog posts where she acts out/parodies New Moon & Eclipse with dolls.  Love it!

So yeah, definitely buy/borrow/check out this book, and I will be posting soon with reviews of her others.

TWD...just the wrong week

I had all the intentions of making the lovely Quick Classic Berry Tart chosen for this week's TWD challenge by Cristine of Cooking with Cristine...but sadly, once again, I was sidelined by illness.  I don't know what is going on, but it seems like right about every 3 weeks I get sick with a fever.  It is probably just related to my CFS/fibro/broken body, but it is annoying.  My house was crying out to be cleaned but I accomplished NOTHING all weekend.  Didn't even get to cook or make dessert for mothers day!  I did pry myself out of bed to go see my mom, and thankfully had some leftover casserole that I was able to scoop into a smaller dish and reheat... And I had the leftover ice cream from last week's TWD which I never posted about!  So here is my ice cream post...a week late. 

When I saw the Burnt Sugar Ice Cream (chosen by Becky of Project Domestication) I was SO excited because it was going to be my first time making ice cream...and with my new kitchenaid ice cream attachment!  Woohoo!  (and it was my birthday, which is also fun (; )  Being the ice cream virgin that I am, on Monday night I got all my ingredients out and ready and then grabbed the ice cream attachment..still in the box...out of my cabinet.  I started reading the instructions...Ohhh...the ice cream attachment has to be frozen for...15 hours!!!...before you can use it...hmmm....looks like there will not be any ice cream tonight.  So into the freezer my ice cream bowl went, and back into the refrigerator went all the ingredients.

Now, I had wanted to make it the night before so I would have time to post on Tuesday because, of course, Tuesday was my birthday and I had dinner plans with my parents (stupid hubs had a game to film.  boo.) But obviously that didn't work and I decided that I would make and post the ice cream on Tuesday night.  (you see how I don't understand ice cream?  it needs time)

So after my wonderful Mexican birthday dinner where I stuffed my face with chimichangas and mexican mush (and talked about some super exciting things that I will be able to reveal in about 3 weeks) I came home, spent a bit more time with my mom and then started on the ice cream.  Again. 

Just like Dorie says, the caramel mixture seized up like crazy and it actually took me a while to get it to smooth out--probably because I was using a pan that was way too small.  When I would stir the "custard" things would slosh and slur and then fizzle on my burners.  bah.  I also had my trusty instant-read thermometer out but the mixture really did not thicken like I think it should have.  It reached the required temperature, and in my impatience I decided to go ahead and pull it off the stove. 

Now I was ready to churn some ice cream! 

Oh wait...

The mixture has to cool?!?!?  After I've just spent all that time getting it up to 170 but not over 180 degrees?  BOO!!

So I stick the mixture into the fridge, and my ice cream bowl back into the freezer.  and wait.

30 minutes...still warm to the touch.

45 minutes...still slightly warm...

60 minutes.  Forget it.  I'm making ice cream!!

Well.  That didn't really work.  I poured it into the ice cream container and churned for at least 30 minutes but all it did was get cold and maybe a tiny tiny bit thick.  But hey, anything liquid will freeze right?  So I stuck it in a container in the freezer anyway hoping that magic would happen overnight.  

But it wasn't magic.  The next day I basically had sweetened frozen cream.  Very icy texture.  It still tasted good though.  

I spent a few days scraping bits of ice milk out of the container before I had the genius idea to put it in the fridge to let it melt and then (since it would be cold, right?) try to churn it and make ice cream.  

And guess what?  

It worked!!!!   

I made real, honest-to-goodness, Ice Cream!!!   I could tell that it was going better since it really thickened up as it was churning and I was so excited!

So even though I was too sick to make anything for Mother's Day, I had for real homemade ice cream that we ate over toasted croissants with sliced strawberries.  And it was quite lovely if I do say so myself :)

(oh...with the whole impatience thing...I didn't let my caramel cook long enough so I didn't get quite the depth of flavor that some of the TWD-ers got, but I think this suited the people I was feeding quite well.)

little kitty friend was very interested in the ice cream...

I don't know why I was such an impatient person with this challenge because I am normally very patient and don't mind waiting for things, but ice cream brings it out in me I guess!  Well, thanks so much to Betty for choosing this recipe, and sorry to Cristine that I didn't get to the berry tart--hope to do that soon!

msc...will be late

fyi, i will be late posting my martha stewart cupcakes club for this week, but do still hope to get to it.

also, i had another weird spider dream last night.  this time they were lowering from the ceiling onto our bed.  i started screaming in my sleep and woke hubs up before i realized that once again, it was just a dream.  i have been sleeping HORRIBLY this week.  probably from the fever and illness, but my whole body hurts constantly and my sleep has been very restless.  blech.  contemplating some blue medicine for tonight...

there is no TWD today.  my little body is sick.  i had two good weeks which were wonderful, but after fighting through so much pain yesterday my body gave in today.  :(  i really want to make the Swedish Visiting cake that was chosen for this week, and will probably make it later in the week.  anyway, thanks to Nancy of The Dogs eat the Crumbs (love that title!) for picking this week, and I hope to join you later!

what a tiny mouth you have!

The better to eat you with my dear??  haha i'm so clever ;)

I had to go to the dentist today b/c I am having some pain from my wisdom teeth coming in (oh, and the fact that I'm over a year past due for my cleaning...)  I was dreading it b/c I have: overactive salivary glands, a small mouth, and very acidic saliva (i know you were just dying to know all of this about me, right?).  All those combined mean that I have some really bad problems w/tarter buildup--but b/c it builds up I never get cavities...just gum disease ;) I hate going to the dentist b/c it hurts and they yell at me, but I couldn't keep putting it off for fear that my wisdom teeth would get infected or something miserable like that.

It was my first time with this hygenist and the first thing she said is "You have a tiny mouth!  Is that as wide as you can open it?  I don't know if he will even be able to get back there to pull your wisdom teeth!"  Yikes.  She actually ended up being very nice and giving me some good tips, and we scheduled a time to get one of my teeth out (we're going to have to pull them one by one as they come in due to my small mouth and lack of dental insurance.  YUCK!)

Then, she told me that she wanted me to stop using my current toothbrush...and gave me this:

yep.  i have a tigger toothbrush.

Just so you can get an idea of the size, here it is compared to a normal grownup toothbrush:

I feel silly. 

Oh well...hopefully it helps!  lol. 

Also, I did not do the TWD recipe for this week, though I did still make one of the treats chosen previously (which is my favorite to date).  I have noticed an odd trend...I have not made any of the bundt cakes except for the banana cake which was my 2nd recipe ever.  Weird...I mean, I really do love bundt cakes--their simplicity, their "freezeability", the lack of decoration (I really do not like decorating cakes).  But I've skipped all of them!  I may go back and make the coconut tea cake from last week, but mocha is just not my thing anyway.   Thanks anyway to Erin of When in Doubt...Leave it at 350 for picking this week's recipe!

you know the feeling when you have a fever and your eyelids feel like they're burning?? 


yep.  that's the one.

thoughts on healthcare from someone who works in the industry

A lot of my friend's blogs have had posts on the newly passed healthcare reform bill, and while I don't pretend to be someone who is knowledgeable about, or even very interested in, politics I just wanted to throw in a few thoughts.  I'm not making a political statement and am not well informed enough to make judgments on this bill, but as a person who works directly with insurance companies in the healthcare industry, and having chronic health conditions these are the things I know for sure:

• The system as it has been does not work.  I spent this morning sending accounts to collections and having to discharge patients from our practice for not paying their bills--very often because the patients are uninsured or underinsured. It is not fun to tell a family that they can no longer see their pediatrician because they have not paid their bills.  I waver between being very jaded and callous about the situation to being absolutely broken hearted at this part of my job. 
• The people who are suffering under the current system are often the middle class--there are state programs to support low income families, many providers offer discounts for the uninsured, and most wealthy families have access to good coverage through large companies. Then there are the middle class families--many are paying out of control premiums to have coverage at all, but their plans require deductibles and coinsurances which still cause the patients to pay most services out of pocket. However, since they "have insurance" no additional discounts are generally given. (this is a generalization, I know, but it is what I see daily)
• I have watched insurance companies go back to charges filed a year ago and recoup payment stating that they paid in error--most of the time b/c patients did not update other insurance information (which is only requested once a claim is filed) or because they made a retroactive preexisting review and decided that a condition was not reported and therefore the patient should not have been covered at all.  Then the patients are stuck with hundreds of dollars worth of bills that they thought were covered.  
• At 25, I have been denied insurance coverage for my health conditions.  The one plan that would accept me had a $1200 per MONTH premium.  Thankfully I have coverage through my husband's work (at over $300 a month just for me, and that is with his employer paying part of my premium), but if we lose that coverage I am in big trouble, because my office (despite being a doctor's office) does not offer insurance to employees, and without a group plan I am basically uninsurable. 
• Many of the families who do have insurance are completely ignorant of their policies.  Whether this is user error or failure of HR departments, employers, or agents to explain the terminology, I don't know, but it is awful.  They don't know that their insurance applies vaccinations and preventative care to a deductible...and then they get a several hundred dollar bill that they are stuck with.
• Communication from insurance companies and the many requirements to keep a policy active and up to date are very confusing, and generally only come up when there is a claim filed.  75% of the denials I deal with are for Coordination of benefits: the insurance wants to know whether or not the patient has any other active coverage.  This is an extremely routine thing that most companies require every 6-9 months, but the patients don't understand it.  Then they don't fill out the paperwork or call the insurance company.  Then all their claims are denied.  I do my best to educate our patients on this with letters and phone calls, but there is only so much that the provider can do b/c only the subscriber can update this information (don't even get me started on what happens in situations of divorce when one parent gets the bills but the other holds the insurance!).

Like I said, I do not know enough about this plan to really make a judgment on whether or not I think it will work, and I honestly don't have any great suggestions, but what we have now is not working.  I see the nasty side of things every single day at my job, and it is so hard when you are dealing with children who NEED these services but their parents can't afford to pay.

friday favorites

First I'll give you a hint of what is NOT my favorite...

I love my yummy brunch and all, but do you see the eggs?  Do you remember what they mean?  Yep.  Sick again.  (or should it be still??)  I finished my antibiotics for a sinus infection on Monday.  I had Dr. John look at me again on Thursday b/c on Wednesday I had started to feel worse.  He said I managed to pick up a virus while my immune system was down from the week before.  bah.  I am kinda afraid that it is the flu b/c last night I started to run a fever, and of course I am exposed to every nasty thing in my office.  But I haven't had the energy to get up and go to the doctor again.  I am considering firing my body.  It's performance has been seriously sub-par, especially since the start of the new year.  Does anyone have any good recommendations on where I can get a well-functioning new one? Any ideas at all?  Even a temp to get me through this season...let me know.

So what is my favorite this week?

My bed. But I cannot pretend that it looks this lovely right now...this picture was taken when I had first got the new bedding over the summer...now...well, just imagine bottles of medicine, tissues and magazines strewn about, and very rumpled sheets and pillows.

We got together to hang out at 6:00 last night, and had quite a wonderful time if I do say so myself.  I finally started on Julia Child's My Life in France and made it through the first hundred or so pages, finished a few magazines when my head was too fuzzy to focus on a book, had lovely cuddles w/the pets, and was surrounded by the things I need:  blue medicine, tissues, my ipod, my laptop, magazines, books, water, and my cuddly ones.  Hubs didn't get home from filming until I was extremely out of it at 10:00, and then I got even more cuddles from my favorite!  Bed and I had a lovely morning as well, hanging out until 11:30--I love the bed so much that I even had a dream about sleeping in it and never wanting to get up!  This dream was mirrored by reality.  I have been up for about an hour to make my eggs and post, but I think I will return to it in a short time...

on illness and quiche

Well, I'm sick again (what else is new right?). Dr. John, who I work for and who has been my doctor since I was 2 years old (they made me get a "grown up doctor" when I first got chronic stuff in '07, but I still see him for little stuff while I'm working) checked me today at work and said that my poor little throat was as red as my scrubs :( about this red. So now I'm on some loverly antibiotics once again as well as decongestants. February has been a bad health month, and I was seriously getting the blues about it earlier. I feel like I just sleep and do the bare minimum of house cleaning on the weekends (which I am blessed to have 3 days long) but my body is still constantly worn out and attracts these germs like a magnet! (I'm sure working at a pediatric doctor's office does not help...)

this is how I feel


this too

Well class, if you have been following along, you will remember that I like to eat eggs when I am sick. (I just had to buy 2 1/2 dozen more this week). I had also recently purchased some leeks with the goal of making some leek potato soup. That sounded good, but I feel that it's hard to make soup for just one person ('cause we know hubs won't be eatin' any!) and I was wanting something especially bad-for-you-comforting. Enter...mushroom leek & bacon quiche!!

Now this is an amalgamation of multiple recipes online and in cookbooks--I just considered what I had on hand and how much time I wanted to actually spend preparing and baking it, and threw it together. But it was GOOD. I considered eating, almost had, ok, definitely ate half of the quiche right after it came out of the oven *shame* It is just so good and gooey and savory and comforty. sigh.

So here is the recipe--I cheated and used a frozen pie crust and precooked bacon, but hey, a girl's gotta do what she can when she feels like crap!

Mushroom, Leek & Bacon Quiche

3 leeks--whites and a few inches of light green, sliced
8-10 small mushrooms (i used baby bellas), sliced
4 slices bacon (i used precooked, but you can fry your own and then saute the leeks & mushrooms in about 1 tbsp of the grease instead of the butter)
3 tbsp. butter
pinch kosher salt
approx 2 cups shredded cheese (i used a mix of mozzarella & "fiesta blend"--just use what you have on hand)
4 eggs
3/4 cup half & half (or a combo of skim milk & cream, which is basically the same ;) )
dash pepper
pinch nutmeg
1 unbaked deep dish pie crust

Preheat the oven to 350 F
-Saute the leeks and mushrooms in butter over medium heat until soft (about 10-15 minutes) add a bit of kosher salt if using unsalted butter. Add bacon to mixture towards the end to let it heat back up. Remove mixture from heat and allow to cool for a few minutes, then place in the pie crust.

-Cover vegetable/bacon mixture with cheese
-Whisk together eggs, half & half, pepper, & nutmeg. Pour over cheese, pressing down to make sure that all the dry ingredients are covered. (i sprinkled a few bits of bacon over the top...just for fun)

-Bake at 350 for 30 minutes or until a knife inserted into the center comes out clean.
-Cool on a rack for at least 5 minutes before serving.

yum


even yummer

Of course, you can probably make this healthier by using skim milk, sauteing in olive oil rather than butter, cutting back on the cheese and eliminating the bacon...but what sick girl wants to eat that?

One thing (other than the quiche) that made my day a little more joyful--I found a wonderful surprise at Walmart...

MEYER LEMONS!!!

So I had never even heard of these things before entering the blogging world, but for the past year I have been looking every time I go to the grocery and lusting after the recipes made with them online. I was so excited to find these! Bowling Green, while not such po-dunk country town is lacking a lot of the wonderful culinary treats that you see in cities that have such exciting places as Whole Foods & Trader Joes (I mean, you can't even get Dutch-processed cocoa powder here!). So I snatched these up with dreams (and trepidation) of what to make. Any suggestions? I won't be baking until the weekend (got to get over this bug) so if you have a favorite recipe highlighting meyer lemons, please share it! I'm hoping that the store won't break my heart like it did years ago with blood oranges--I find them once and then they never return :(

I also got the wheat germ which was intended for the TWD cookies this week, which I obviously didn't make. Hopefully will do those over the weekend (it's becoming Saturdays with Dorie for me lately)

Hope you are all staying away from illnesses!

Leftover potatoes soup, and a sick week

Sickness is part of the Edmundson household this week. I overdid it last weekend w/my lovely girls, and sadly had to pay the price...pretty much all week. On superbowl Sunday while everyone was having parties, I was cuddled up w/my butch feeling miserable (I got up fairly early, then went back to sleep until 1) The next day I got up to get ready for work and once again was in bad bad shapes. I went back to bed, and this time slept until 3! and I only woke up then b/c hubs called me! yikes. I made myself get up and work for the rest of the week, but felt increasingly bad as the week went on. One of my docs checked me out and said it didn't look like an infection, actually "for you, your throat and nose look really good!" so I guess it is just stupid CFS/Fibro stuff. I'm kinda bummed b/c it's been a while since I've been "out of commission" for that reason alone. Lately I've tended to have that plus a sinus infection or stomach virus. I thought maybe my symptoms were improving, but nope.

Also, kitty is in bad health. He is a fighter, and came home last Saturday night with another cat's claw tangled up in his forehead fur! Also there are cuts and scabs and just messes all over him. The next day, he started to sneeze...a LOT. It's kinda weird. Then on Tuesday I got up and he was drooling...tons of drool just pouring out of his mouth, and his little eyes were runny. He was a sick little one. So I called the vet from my work and got him an appointment for that evening. They checked him out, gave us some antibiotics and decongestant as well as some more worm medicine (that cat gets tape worms all the time!) Well...have you ever tried to give a cat a pill? Normally he does well w/his pills. We just stick a pill in one of those greenies pill pockets and he eats it right up. I guess since he's sick, his appetite is down and he's extra finicky, and none of my tricks work! As a result, my fingers and arms are full of scratches and bites from where he has tried to kill me for giving him pills. Last night I got hubs to hold him (wrapped up like a burrito in a thick bath towel) while I tried to shove some pills down his throat. We got them in, squirted some water in there and then held his mouth shut and blew in his nose (supposed to help him swallow). Well, he was angry and ran and hid...by the time that I found him he had spit out both of the pills. boo! Finally I gave in, crushed the antibiotic and mixed it with a bit of cream cheese and smeared it on his upper lip. Today he seems to finally be feeling better and has eaten some of his normal food and treats for the first time in a week! Still sneezing a bit, but hopefully on the mend. Butch, on the other hand, (while still healthy) is extrememly jealous of all the attention that her kitty has been getting. I've got to remember to give her some extra cuddles.

Oh yeah, and when I took kitty to the vet, it started snowing really badly again and my tires are awful so I was slipping and sliding all over the place! When we were oh-so-close to home I was parked at a stoplight waiting to make a right turn. Well, some idiot thought that snow and ice were no match for them, and rear-ended me. Thankfully they were in the process of slowing down so it wasn't too hard, and I have an old old car with the rubber bumpers that actually help when someone bumps into you so there was no damage. I was a bit sore for the rest of the week though.

Bah. Well, all of this had me wanting something warm and comforting for my little throat today. I still had some leftovers from last weekend which I have been slowly whittling away at, and I decided to make some soup!

YUM!

There's no real recipe, but here is the gist of what I did:
I had about a cup of leftover hashbrown casserole, as well as some leftover pot roast that I had cooked with potatoes and onions (about 2 cups). I removed the meat and ate it on its own, then I threw the potatoes, onions, casserole, about a half cup of milk, a few tablespoons of cream cheese, about a 4th cup of sour cream, and some pepper into a big pot and cooked it on medium high heat. Once it started bubbling a little I got out my immersion blender to puree the larger potato pieces a bit, and get everything incorporated. I think I probably cooked it for about 10 minutes all together (I did add things as I thought of them instead of all at once).
It is so delicious! As you can see in the picture, there are still a few tiny bits of the beef potroast and they gave it a wonderfully rich flavor. I also left the potato skins on when I cooked the pot roast so there was that too. It was so creamy and warmed me up inside! I think I will really enjoy this for the rest of my sick weekend.

What are you doing to keep warm?

Friday favorites...

Okay...I'm gonna get some grief f/m my co-workers for this one...but i figured it is appropriate considering my lousy health this month (have i mentioned that i'm ready for january to be over?)

this week's "Friday favorite" is...

BLUE MEDICINE!!!
(aka Tylenol Cough & Sore Throat)

Here's the deal. I LOVE this stuff. Hubs got me some a long long time ago (when he was still just "boyfriend") when I was sick in the dorms. I really like the "cool burst" sensation--I think it's quite yummy!

It helps with all the problems I have and my pain and my throat. Good stuff. And the nighttime kind makes me sleep so much better when I'm sick!

Now, they say I need an intervention. It is true that I always have a bottle (daytime) in my desk at the office. And I offer it to my co-workers regularly (I just want them to feel better!). But I really only take it when I have a cough or sore throat--not just for fun! (though it is quite delicious in my opinion)

No TWD for me

This girl (this one...right here)...she is sick. boo. slight fever, sore throat, and a body that feels like it was hit by a truck. maybe exercising was a bad choice last night?

I think i would have liked to Coco-Nana bread, but it was not meant to be...

head over to Steph's blog Obsessed with Baking to see the recipe

in the meantime, i will be under one of my knitted blankets cuddling my butchy and drinking some chai tea

twd...maybe tomorrow?

Well, I definitely want to make these oatmeal almost candy bar thingies that everyone is RAVING over but I do not have the right kind of oats...so these will have to wait till tomorrow evening. But I think hubs will like them so I definitely need to make these!

see you tomorrow!

btw...I am feeling better today. Still a little off, but the pain is better--thanks for the prayers and encouragement!

old lady feet

well, this will be kinda a downer post, but this is my blog so i'm allowed to whine! you've been warned. (oh, and there are feet pictures--eep!)

Today I went to the podiatrist for an extra extended visit for my plantar fasciitis. It was a pretty good experience overall, except I made the excruciatingly painful decision to go ahead and get a cortisone injection into my left foot. After all the pain I went through w/the right foot, I did eventually notice a difference and was actually able to walk on it with out pain. I figured that two days of crippling pain were a fair trade off for a few weeks of much less pain. I thought maybe that the injection with this doctor would be a little less painful since she specializes in this...but no. At least I was mostly prepared.

Other than the injection we did xrays of my feet which confirmed what I already knew (it's plantar fasciitis--woohoo!) and also showed that I have a bit of a heel spur...but that isn't the source of my pain she said. We talked about inserts and stretches...and then she fixed me up with these babies....

I call them my "foot corsets" sexy huh?

Bascially it's a few layers of ace bandages with a strap to hold it in place between my toes and pads that sit in my arches. I wear them every day, all day (except in the shower)...each set should last a week and they gave me two sets--enough to last me until my next visit in feb. 1st.

at least butch doesn't think i'm a loser!

Upon leaving the office I noticed that everyone else there was in the octogenerian age range...am I really just 25? I had to go to work afterwards and was hobbling around any time that I had to walk. One of my co-workers has a crutch right now due to a knee injury and I was threatening to steal it. Then, to make matters worse my lower back strarted throbbing and I was getting shooting pains up and down my legs. Great. Looks like a fibro flare up in the midst of all this! Well, I'm sitting in my chair with my massage and heating pads on contemplating a very early bed time. meh. Okay...time to pull myself out of this funk b/c we all know that it could be much worse! Forgive my selfishness...

On a positive note, I made a key lime pie for one of the doctors' birthday today. I was really nervous b/c we always get his birthday pie from Red Lobster and it is his favorite. I love my key lime pie recipe, but I haven't tried the Red Lobster one so I didn't know how they would compare, and he had made a comment about how some key lime pies were too heavy and some were just glorified whipped cream...Well, he loved it so much he had extra (and this doc never gets seconds of dessert!) and he came and asked for my recipe! I felt very special and happy to make that for him :)

Now I guess I need to pry myself off this chair and get some orders baked for later this week. Just pray for me to have patience and a positive attitude in all this. I'm kinda bummed. It just gets me down that all my "conditions" are chronic/lifetime conditions and have no more than symptomatic treatment. Okay. I know. It could be much worse. Thanks for listening (reading?) anyway!

so once again, i have been neglecting the blog-so sorry! life has been absolutely crazy...
i was gonna upload some pictures of the craziness, but the stupid computer is tired.

suffice it to say, i baked myself silly for the office christmas party last week--36 loaves of bread and thousands of cookies...i stayed up till 3 am last friday night and was so tired and discouraged because i just was NOT managing my time well. I had to go to walmart at midnight for something...i don't remember what now...maybe eggs??--oh wait, it was treat bags for the cookies!! i was so tired and hurting that i was literally holding back tears! then i came home and was getting frustrated so i started throwing bits of cookie dough on the ground. It was so nasty that I JUST cleaned it tonight b/c it was so intimidating. I did not get all the cookies done in time for the party, but I took the rest back to the office and everyone loved them. The party also went really well, and I collapsed that night and stayed in bed for the rest of the weekend and unfortunately on Monday as well b/c my stupid sinus infection got worse and the CFS, fibro, and plantar fasciitis were just wearing me out!

Hubs has been super busy the past few weeks as well and it's been hard--we've had very little time together and i miss him :( We got a bit of a date night on Tuesday evening and went to get new phones! yippee! My poor little razor got too tired just like me. The screen started displaying upside down or then not at all some of the buttons stopped working. I was planning to get one of the .99 or $10 phones with renewing my contract, but they had a buy one get one free deal on the LG Spyder so hubs and I both got them--I feel so fancy! and now I have a texting plan too!!

I have been very busy w/dessert orders as well as my scentsy business so that is also super exciting! I feel very blessed to have something on the side that can bring a little extra money for us.

Finally--and I can't go into details yet--I need to ask for your prayers. We have some major changes and decisions ahead that were not expected. I will be posting about it fairly soon I think, but just please pray for us! If you really want to know the details feel free to FB message or email me, it's just not something that I can put out publicly yet. (and no, it doesn't involve babies)

Well, hopefully I will be more consistent, and I hope you are all having a great Christmas season!